Lada aiziet pensijaa.

What do you call a Lada with a sun roof? A skip

HOW do you make a Lada disappear? Apply rust remover.

WHAT is the most important part of the Lada owners’ manual? The bus timetable at the back.

HOW can you guarantee you won’t ever land a speeding ticket? Buy a Lada.

WHY does a Lada have a heated rear To keep your hands warm when you’re pushing it.

HOW do you know your Lada is environmentally friendly? It doesn’t start.

WHY is every Lada fitted with two spare wheels? So you can cycle home.

WHAT do you call a Lada with twin exhaust pipes? A wheelbarrow.

WHAT is the similarity between a Lada and a bathtub? You can’t step out of either in a public place.

WHAT’S the definition of an optimist? The owner of a Lada with an alarm system.

WHAT’S the difference between a Lada and the flu? You can get rid of the flu.

WHAT’S the difference between a Jehovah’s Witness and a Lada? You can shut the door on a Jehovah’s Witness.

WHAT do you call the shock absorbers on a Lada? Passengers.

DID you hear about the bloke who had his Lada broken into? The thieves installed a radio for him.

WHAT’S the difference between a Lada and a golf ball? You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.

WHAT do you call a Lada at the top of a hill? A miracle.

HOW do you make a policeman laugh? Tell him your Lada just got stolen.

WHY is there a light under the Lada’s bonnet? So you can fix it 24 hours a day.

WHAT do you call a Lada in winter? A freezer.

WHAT do you call a Lada in summer? An oven.